Trump’s Lies, Part II: The Tells
As the most prolific liar in modern political history, Chump inevitably has certain verbal “tells” he employs before he lies. Below, I describe two of the more prominent ones.
1. “They say.” When Chump says this, the next thing that comes out of his mouth is a lie. As in, “I’m not a doctor, but they say zinc works. It hasn’t gone through all the tests, but they say it works.” This is what Chump said yesterday at his daily propaganda session, when speaking about his latest Hail Mary remedy for the coronavirus. He apparently believes that by invoking that the all-knowing and ambiguous “they,” he is establishing some kind of credibility for the grasping nonsense he is about to declare. It establishes nothing of the sort; “they say” merely lets us know to brace for impact, because Pinocchio’s nose is about to grow by a foot.
2. “Somebody told me.” / “(A specific person) told me.” These brief preambles are the more intimate version of the “tell” described above. Trump usually employs these in attempt to establish credibility for a more narrowly targeted untruth. Here is a typical example, “You know I love my generals. They’re straight out of central casting. One of them came up to me and said (here, Trump puts on his ‘crew-cut-military-guy’ voice), ‘Sir..’ He said, ‘Sir, I think you’re doing a terrific job. You’re doing a really terrific job and my men all really love what you’re doing for the service.’ “
In this example, Chump performs a “meta-tell.” He fabricates a general in order to generate a personally relayed compliment for himself. Then, he additionally has the fake general say make-believe compliments that are attributed to a band of make-believe soldiers. If you are slightly confused at this point, that’s natural. Sowing confusion is a classic tactic of the con man; he gets your head spinning in order to bilk you without your noticing it. And interestingly, any confusion you feel is also likely being felt by Trump. Trump is a fantastically unproductive and lazy human being. The bulk of his time is spent watching witless pundits whinny out his own administration’s propaganda on TV, sending out strings of adolescent-sounding tweets and golfing, a game at which he cheats. He likely feels the need to retreat, childlike, into these pursuits because the dust devils of confusion stirred up by his ceaseless lying are too daunting for him to face.
